I really hope that things turn out for the best.
I want to get in, I REALLY do. I missed the events and the girls this week. It feels strange. I don't know.
And I want to be a part of Student Senate! I want to participate, and be all wrapped up in it. Yes, that would be lovely.
I feel like the drive I had in high school just kicked in like two weeks ago. I believe that the part of me that likes leadership and involvement just couldn't be on the back burner anymore; it had had enough. Now that I have the drive again, the passion for involvement, the desire to be an active student on campus, there is nothing more that I want than to accomplish my goals. I feel like something has kicked in for me this semester. I feel a lot better about my major, my goals, my ambitions, and my life (overall). Things aren't perfect but I know what I'd like to do in the future and I've made efforts to change my miserable self. Seriously, I've been a miserable shell of who I used to be for a long while. I don't want to be passive any longer! This isn't enough, I want MORE. I need to experience MORE! This is my second year at URI, clearly there are more things to live and learn through. I'm ready for it.
I was giving blood today and this kid on the table next to me was all worried about the needle stick so I was talking to him to try and take his mind off of it. The nurse taking care of me jokingly said "so you're going to be a psychologist?" because of how I acted and I got to say "actually, yes; I'm a psych major." Yessssssssssssss.
I'm going home this weekend! It will be nice to sleep in my own bed and be with my family and my friends from D-town. I luuuuuurve them! I haven't seen Rachael in about a month and it's been weeks since I've really gotten to spend a significant amount of time with anyone. Gah.
Oh life. I desire experiences. I desire meeting new people. I desire alterations to my monotonous routine. Let's see what's in store.
In case you haven't noticed, I'm moving on from the awfulness of V-day. What's the point of flooding my brain with even MORE cynicism? I refuse to. I also refuse to continue to pity myself. Nothing has been finalized yet, but because I've put effort forth, I feel as though I've progressed by leaps and bounds. And I can be content whenever I choose to, I've just chosen NOT to (unfortunately) for oh...over six months. I've been dissatisfied for so long that it has just become part of what I feel. No longer will I internalize my poor sense of self. I don't want to feel like I need JUST ONE MORE THING to be happy any longer. I have so much, I ought to be grateful instead of greedy. I don't NEED just one more thing, I am appreciative of what I have. And that's my introspection for the night.
stop stealing my thoughts lol
i was uberinvolved in highschool too and before i joined senate i was like "whaaaaaa? i'm in ONE thing? this is bullshit!". so now i feel better being more active in extracurriculars again haha
same here with the V-day stuff. i'm sick of feeling like i need someone else to make me happy... i just want to be content with what i HAVE for once.
i'm glad we're friends :D